The cow is, of course, the ultimate dual-purpose animal for the smallholder, since it is able to provide both meat and milk - the latter being the starting point for all kinds of delectable products, including two things that most of us eat almost every day, butter and cheese.

Having said that, I have to come clean about my very limited experience of the dairy side of cattle. Marge, the River Cottage house cow, arrived in the spring of 1999 with her two-month-old calf, for whom she was producing a plentiful supply of milk - enough, I had hoped, for me to tax the odd couple of litres for personal consumption. This was not necessarily an unrealistic aim. There is a smallholding tradition of sharing a house cow's milk with her unweaned calf, especially in the spring when the lush grass can help her produce enough milk to cope with this extra demand. But to be carried out successfully, this strategy requires a degree of organisation on the part of the smallholder, and no little co-operation on the part of cow and calf. The routine (which needs to be daily, and regular as clockwork, if cow and calf are to tolerate it) is to walk them into your shelter at night, into separate compartments where they are close enough for the calf to derive comfort from its mother's presence but far enough apart so that it cannot suckle. First thing the following morning, the smallholder milks the cow's bulging udder, leaving enough for a modest breakfast for her calf. Cow and calf then run together all day, when the calf will be able to get all the milk it needs, and they are separated again in the evening.

Surprise, surprise, I wasn't quite able to get to grips with this routine. My milking sessions with Marge were confined to surreptitious raids in the field at random times of day. Once in a while I could get her settled enough on a trough of rolled barley to extract a pint or two, while her calf stood by glaring at me resentfully. And pretty soon I gave up even on this. My consolation is that Marge's calf, who eventually had the full benefit of an untaxed milk supply, turned out to be a superb bit of beef.

The lesson I learned is that the dairy side of smallholding, be it with cows, goats or even milk sheep, is perhaps the most demanding of time and energy, and the one that requires the greatest commitment. If you want to take a short break once in a while, or go on holiday, you may be able ask a neighbour to feed the pigs and water the garden, but I fear they will be loath to take on your milking responsibilities.

If I were to pretend that I had anything to teach you, beyond that simple caveat, about dairy farming, I would be guilty of gross hypocrisy. (And my friend and neighbour, Frank, who experiences the trials and tribulations of modern commercial dairy farming on a daily basis would be sorely peeved, and who could blame him?) So for those who wish to pursue, with more tenacity and success than I have been able to, the dairy side of smallholding, I highly recommend John Seymour's seminal work, The Complete Book of Self-Sufficiency (Dorling Kindersley, 1996). It is clear that the dairy cow is Seymour's personal favourite on the farm (as the pig is mine), and his pages on it are thorough and truly inspirational.

The side of cattle that now interests me most is small-scale beef production. And by small scale, I mean tiny: the raising and slaughter of a single beef steer per year. I can't pretend to be any great expert on that either, but the joy of it is that you don't really need to be. If your interest in beef production is not commercial or competitive, you can have a very relaxing time of it. For two-thirds of the year your cattle will take care of their own dietary needs, while a little bit of good pasture management may provide you with enough hay to take care of the remaining third. And when the time comes to slaughter, there is no reason why your steer should not provide you with beef as good any you have ever tasted.

Choosing a cow

Cattle is the generic term for all cows, whether beef or dairy, but individual animals go by various names according to their age, sex and purpose. To avoid confusion, it's worth explaining these terms at the outset:

Cow: an adult female, for producing milk and calves
Bull: an adult male, usually a stud animal
Bullock: a castrated male, usually reared for beef
Steer: another word for a bullock; a beef animal
Heifer: a young female; technically, a cow that has not yet had a calf, though she may be referred to as a 'calved heifer' until she has had her second calf

An ideal way to start out with cattle is to buy a cow and calf. Buy in spring or early summer, when the calf is still just a couple of months old and not yet weaned, and you have the option of taking milk from her as well (see above for how this can be achieved, or in my case not achieved). The calf should itself be proof of the cow's fertility. In terms of assessing her general health, look for a richly coloured, shiny coat, a bright eye, and a placid, easygoing temperament. You should certainly inspect her udder, feeling both the bag and the teats very carefully. If there are any hard lumps there, she has probably had mastitis, and may get it again. This means she will have trouble feeding her calf, and any milk you get will be useless. She is best avoided.

Any cow, steer or calf you buy must have an ear tag and up-to-date documentation showing she is TT (tuberculosis tested) and brucellosis free. You will also have to register your 'herd' (even if it is only two animals) with DEFRA (Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs) and comply with the various veterinary requirements stipulated by it. And you will have to take your documentation with your animal to slaughter.

You need to make friends with your resident house cow, whether or not you are going to milk her. She should be happy to let you touch her, scratch her muzzle, even put your arms around her neck. If she is already trained to be led by a halter, so much the better. You can tell the age of a cow by the number of, and wear on, her teeth. But that's a matter for experts. The bottom line is, if you are buying your first cow, take someone with you who knows what to look for. It is a fact of rural life that good-natured, healthy, fertile cows with a few good years left in them are hard to buy - not least because their owners will be understandably reluctant to part with them. If a farmer with a herd of cows is ready to sell you one, you can be sure he will want to sell you the worst in his herd.

There are one or two exceptions to this rule. Farmers who are selling up an entire herd will be selling the good as well as the bad. And some smallholders will deliberately raise good heifers and then get them in calf with a view to selling them on with their calf, at a small profit, to the likes of you. There is no reason why these girls should not be excellent cows, but the slight drawback is she is likely to be sold with her first ever calf, which means that she and you will both be beginners. You will have to work hard at your bond with the cow, perhaps halter training her yourself. The upside is that, if all goes well, and the two of you become firm friends, she has over a decade of loyal service in her, and perhaps as many as a dozen calves to give you.

What breed?

There are a number of breeds to choose from, and the most common distinctions that are drawn between them are whether they are native or Continental breeds, and whether they are beef, dairy, or dual purpose. Native breeds are the obvious choice for the smallholder because they are hardier than Continentals. They do not have to be housed over the winter (though they do need an accessible shelter in their pasture) and they do not need as much extra processed feed (called 'concentrate') as a Continental breed will during these cold months. As for the beef/dairy/dual-purpose issue, that depends whether milking is part of your plan.

Here are some of your options:

Dexter

Marge is a Dexter, a hardy, native, miniature, dual-purpose cow now officially designated as a rare breed. I can't say I've sampled a great deal of her milk, for reasons discussed above, but the beef from a distant relative of hers (my first steer was a pure-bred Dexter) was quite superb. The small carcass size makes for easier butchery and storage. I highly recommend Dexters, with the mild caveat that they can be wilful and occasionally uncooperative. If I get another Dexter I will choose one without horns.

Jersey

The obvious choice if you are after milk. The yield is not as high as a Friesian but the milk is superb and the temperament of Jerseys is second to none. Good animals to bond with. Because of the deep yellow colour of the fat, Jersey beef has no commercial viability but in fact it is very good eating.

Red Poll

A good old-fashioned dual-purpose cow - a useful trade-off between good milk and good beef.

Devon Red or Devon Ruby

A traditional West Country beef breed. Excellent, well-marbled meat from hardy cattle with a good temperament.

Angus

The legendary beef animal, Hardy and happy on more marginal or hill grazing. The bulls are good for crossing with dairy animals for beef.

Hereford

The other classic beef breed. Bulls have an unusually good temperament and are therefore a favourite for crossing with dairy cows for a good beef cross.

Welsh Black

A very hardy breed for rough hill grazing. Good beef and low maintenance.

Highland

The hardiest of all, with its thick, shaggy, weatherproof coat. Fine beef.

Breeding

Your aim should be to get your cow to produce one calf every year. Commercial beef farmers aim for a mixture of autumn and spring calves, which gives them a range of animals to take to slaughter at staggered intervals throughout the year. For smallholders, spring is the simplest option as the calf should have an easier time of it adapting instantly to outdoor life. And mum will have plenty of good grass to make milk.

The gestation period for a cow is nine months, so for a March calf a June insemination is ideal. The tradition is to give a cow six weeks after calving before 'serving' her again - i. e. putting her in with a bull. She will be 'bulling' (on heat) every twenty-one days, so should get pregnant within three months of her last calf, and hit roughly the same date the following year.

You need to be able to recognise the signs of bulling. You can then get your cow to a bull, or a bull to your cow, as soon as they start. Or, better still, plan ahead. Make a note of the date she starts bulling, and bring in the bull a day or two before she is due to start again. There are a number of clear-cut signs that a cow is bulling: she may be mounted by other cattle, including her own calf; she may do a bit of mounting herself; she bellows more frequently, in a somewhat wistful manner; she lifts her tail a lot; at the peak of her bulling (which lasts about 18 hours) she may show a trail of clear mucus coming from her vagina. This is known as the 'bulling string'. The alternative to running her with a bull is to bring in the AI (artificial insemination) man. The downside is that your cow will miss out on the romance. But from the smallholder's point of view, it has to be said that AI is a pretty attractive option. You don't have to arrange transport for either your cow or the bull. You don't have to run the gauntlet of an angry bull in your pasture. You can choose from a whole range of pedigree bull sperm. And the success rate is extremely high (usually over 90 per cent).

Whichever route you choose, you will need to make a decision about what breed of bull is going to father your next calf. You may wish to keep the breed pure - in which case the AI man should have the right sperm in the bank if you can't find the right bull nearby. Or you can simply choose a good beef bull, such as a Hereford or Angus, both of whose calves have a reputation for easy calving, even for dairy cows. There is no reason why you cannot ring the changes from year to year and see how the beef turns out each time.

Most cows that are bulling should be happy to be served by any bull - or any AI man come to that - and should get pregnant without any trouble. But there is a piece of cattle-breeding wisdom that says it is easier to get a lean cow pregnant than a fat one. Smallholders' cattle can be somewhat pampered. We tend to err on the side of overfeeding during the winter months, so the extra benefit of the spring grass can put them a little on the fat side. This doesn't mean you should starve your cow to ensure a pregnancy - absolutely not - but if she fails to produce a calf one year, then see her carefully through the winter without overdoing it and you may be in luck the following year.

Calving

Cows don't generally need any help at all with calving, which in springtime they will do quite happily outdoors. The chances are you will walk out one morning and find the new arrival contentedly suckling, while getting a firm licking from its mother. Very occasionally a cow may get into problems delivering her calf, and she will usually make it pretty obvious that she is in distress, bellowing and grunting, and perhaps lying on her side and kicking her legs. If this happens, call the vet at once. If you see hind feet and a tail coming out first, you are looking at a breech delivery. An experienced stockperson will know how to deal with this - usually by tying a rope around the back legs of the calf and pulling hard. But ideally you should not attempt this without the help of someone who has done it before. Calves in breech can drown if not quickly dealt with, so if you have no choice but to tackle the situation unassisted, the key thing is to pull down (i. e. towards the ground) as well as out. And you will have to pull hard.

A more likely problem, but still a rare one, is that a calf may have difficulty finding its mother's milk and getting started. If it hasn't started to suckle within an hour of being born, you should intervene. Help the calf to stand up, and direct its muzzle to the teat, pushing it into its mouth if necessary. If the cow keeps wandering off, tie her up. You really want to make this work, as a calf that does not get the first colostrum (extra-rich milk full of essential organisms and antibodies) is very vulnerable to falling ill.

If beef is your only concern, once your calf is up and feeding well, you can forget about it for a while. It's in safe hands. But if you want to get its mother back on the full-time milk rota, you will have to intervene. You need to separate calf and mother, and ideally put them out of earshot of each other. You can only do this when the calf has had its fill of colostrum, plus a good dose of mother's milk - this means at least three days after birth. But unless you have more than one cow, and more than one calf, so that you can make two separate little herds, one for milk and one for beef, then it is not fair to mother or calf to do this.

A single cow and calf unit should stay together, and if you want to milk the cow you will have to do it by the temporary separation system described above. I hope you have more success than I did!

If you don't want your calf to have horns (and horns can be dangerous, to you, your family, and to livestock), he or she will have to be de-budded. Get a vet to show you how to do this the first time, and you should be able to manage it yourself the next. You can avoid the horn problem by choosing a hornless ('polled') breed of cow. You will also have to put a hornless bull on her, or you run a fifty-fifty risk of a horned calf.

Male calves can be castrated at the same time. The testicles of a young calf are small, but delicious enough not to waste. I fry them up in butter with a bit of sage and have them on toast.

All calves must be registered with the BCMS (British Cattle Movement Service) within twenty-eight days of birth. Youwill be sent a passport and you will have to keep hold of it in order to move, show or take your cattle to slaughter.

Maintaining your herd

The size of your herd depends on how many animals you want to slaughter each year. In my case, it's just the one. This means that at any given time I have either two or three animals on the pasture, depending on whether the newer calf has been born or the older one has gone to slaughter. The only problem is in year one. If, like me, you start with a cow and her young calf, you will not realistically want to slaughter the calf until the summer or autumn of its second year (at the earliest). My solution was to buy a yearling steer (also a Dexter) at the same time as my cow and calf, for slaughter at the end of just one summer. This dealt with my year-one needs very nicely.

Once it's up and running, and provided your cow delivers, this is a very neat and economical system for the smallholder. It means that from spring until late summer you will have three animals feeding on your lush pasture (a cow, a beef animal and a young calf), but when the beef animal has gone for slaughter you just have two to see through the winter. She calves again in the spring and the cycle goes round again.

Summer feeding is easy: provided you can offer them some good grazing, your cattle should look after themselves from March until October or even November in a mild year. The general stocking rate for summer grazing is one cow per acre (half an acre for a calf). So as long as they have this much or more they will be fine. Unless you are trying to maintain your cow for milking (in which case there is a prescribed formula of feeding for hay, silage and/or concentrates to maintain the milk yield), the winter months are not much harder. The grass is growing much more slowly, but your cattle will continue to graze. A bale of hay every couple of days will keep a cow and calf topped up and ticking over. A couple of kilos of rolled oats, and the same of wurzels or stubble turnips, would make a nice weekly treat. If the weather gets very cold, increase the frequency of the treats.

Ideally your calf should be fully weaned before the winter feeding starts. This is achieved by separating cow and calf for at least three or four weeks until the mother has dried up. Then they can be put back together again. If you don't wean your calf it will go on suckling through the winter, and will end up muscling in on mother's milk even after the next calf has been born. Post-BSE legislation means that all cattle for beef must now be slaughtered before thirty months of age. If you operate the same two-calf rotation as I do, you will be slaughtering at around eighteen to twenty months - in the autumn of the calf's second year. The legislation does allow room for a three-calf rotation, according to which you would need to slaughter your calf in the summer of its third year, just before its thirty months are up. This will allow you to take your beef animals to their full adult weight. At the time they go to slaughter they will have two calves following behind, one aged about sixteen to eighteen months, the other about four to six.

Finishing Beef

Most serious beef farmers aiming for the top end of the market will have a formula of extra feed, usually some cocktail of molassed sugar beet, rolled oats and barley, which they will feed to their stock for the last six to eight weeks before slaughter. This is designed to increase the weight of the animals and the fat content of the beef to make it more attractive at market, and is particularly important when finishing beef in the winter months. There is no harm in dabbling with finishing formulas of this kind, and if you do want to slaughter in winter it will certainly improve the quality of the beef. But for the timetable outlined above, where your beef animal is taken to slaughter at the end of a summer on lush grass, it isn't really essential.

Slaughter

Taking a single beef animal to slaughter is not the easiest of things. If it has never been separated from its mother, it is hardly going to want to leave. For this reason, a weaned animal can be taken away more easily than an unweaned one. And an animal that is used to, and accepting of, human contact will be much easier to load up than one that has been running wild. So it is a good idea for the smallholder to bond with a beef calf as well as a breeding cow.

In the old days this would not have mattered. Smallholders could do their own slaughtering - with a bolt gun (humane killer) or .22 rifle, right between the eyes - and the unsuspecting animal would know nothing about it. Though technically this is still an alternative, realistically it is not. Home-slaughtered animals can be consumed only by the owner and his or her immediate family - you can't sell any meat, you can't barter any and you can't even feed it to your guests. These restrictions mean that going to the slaughterhouse is now the only viable option.

When you do take a beef animal to slaughter, make sure you have the manpower to load up the trailer with a minimum of fuss. If you can shut up the animal in your shed or shelter, alone, for a few nights before slaughter, it should be more passive or accepting. It may be a good idea to load up the night before, so the animal can settle in the trailer. Make sure it has water, and a little feed.

Small slaughterhouses, especially those with organic accreditation, tend to offer the smallholder a far more friendly and personal service. The Soil Association can help you find one. Book your animal in for slaughter at a specified time and try not to be too early, or too late. Wait to see it into the slaughter room, and wait while it is done, so you can take away the various offals. Sadly, the only part of the head you are now allowed to keep is the tongue. This you should definitely take, along with the liver, kidneys, heart, lungs and tripe. This latter should be rinsed for you, but it will need a further clean and scrub when you get home. Beef blood can be used to make black pudding, so take a bucket for that too if you want to make some.

Dealing with the carcass

The carcass of a beef cow is big, and dealing with it is correspondingly a big job. You need help, and the best help you can have is from a qualified butcher. So, if you can strike a deal, book the friendliest butcher you know for half a day, watch him and work with him, follow his lead, and try to learn as much as you can.

But even before butchering, there is a problem to be solved. You want your beef to be as delicious as possible - better, you hope, than any you have had before. This means that, ideally, you want it hung for at least three weeks - four or five if you are very confident of its quality. The problem is, where is that going to happen? Not at your place, unless you have invested in a meat fridge where a whole carcass can hang undisturbed at 2-4°C. This is a further favour you will have to ask of your butcher friend. But space is often at a premium in a busy butcher's meat store, and you may have to reach a compromise. The bits that you really want to hang well are the steaks you are going to fry and the joints you are going to roast. In other words, the rump, the sirloin and the ribs. These cuts all happen to link up on the carcass and it is possible to butcher it so that you have two large sides of beef comprising all these prime cuts. More conventionally (since beef carcasses are divided into quarters) you could ask for four pieces - two whole sirloins, ideally with the rump attached, and two whole racks of ribs. If these parts of the carcass, not including the very bulky shoulders and neck, and the hind legs, can be set aside for longer hanging, then the rest can be divvied up for salting, mincing or freezing without too great a loss to your gastronomic plans. Incidentally, hanging means hanging - you cannot hope to mature a piece of beef simply by letting it sit in a fridge.

One way or another, your beef carcass must be rationalised and brought to heel. This is a good time to think about outstanding debts and favours owed: beef may be a welcome form of payment. Inevitably, you are going to freeze a lot of it. Do the hard graft of dividing it into manageable pieces before it goes in the freezer. An entire hindquarter of fresh beef may look daunting, but an entire hindquarter of frozen beef is downright impossible. Remember that the freezer is not the only option. The brine tub can pickle a lot of beef, and save you a considerable amount of freezer space. Remember that a lot of the carcass will only really be good for stewing and mince, albeit excellent stews and top-quality mince. Time spent getting meat off the bone now, trimming it and bagging it up for stew, or mincing it and bagging it up for burgers and bolognese, will be space saved now and time saved later. The bones can be cleaved into manageable sizes, roasted, and used to make the finest beef stock you have ever had - strain it and reduce it hard to concentrate it, then bag it up and freeze it.